“All my efforts to maintain some semblance of control over my life and my emotions did not keep the enemy out, but they did keep God out.”- Esther Fleece
In Chapter 4 (“A Surprising Path to Healing”) of No More Faking Fine, Esther Fleece notes that putting your past behind you doesn’t make it go away. Furthermore, forgetting about an offense doesn’t mean forgiveness occurs.
Also, we must not interpret self-sufficiency as a godly trait. While independence provides needed stability, we make it an idol when we believe accepting help or leaning on others reveals weakness. Yes, healing and lament are costly. But, at some point, we pay too steep a price to keep faking fine.
As a friend of Esther’s counseled her, “Before we can lament our pain and offenses, we must acknowledge them.” Resistance only works for so long. Eventually, we run out of excuses. However, Esther observes, take heed not to misinterpret the ‘do nots’ in Scripture (see Philippians 4:6, John 14:1). Don’t view them as directives to brace yourself for the hard things in life.
God invites you to find comfort in Him, to release all your cares to Him. He’ll handle them on your behalf. A lasting faith rests on a proper understanding of God. Esther recalls how, alone in her hotel room, she truly experienced God’s presence. She writes:
” . . . but here, alone, with nothing to offer Him but the cries of my heart, God drew near to assure me that every one of my laments was already recorded in His scroll. God wasn’t expecting my thank offering or my gratitude: He wanted my heart in its entirety.”
Thus, remembering becomes a tool for your healing, not another way for you to resent your circumstances. Perhaps, Esther posits, God brings painful memories to the surface so you’ll receive a new memory- of Him healing you.
Today’s question: What’s happened when you tried to maintain a semblance of control? Please share.
Tomorrow’s blog: “The discipline of lament- honesty about pain”