“Each time I sin, I am in effect ‘dis-appointing’ God — that is, rejecting his divine appointment to reign for good in my life. I dis-appoint God so that I can appoint myself to be God in his place.”- John Ortberg
As John Ortberg concludes Chapter 12 of I’d Like You More . . . , he discusses moving from rupture to repair symbols three and four.
3. A caution sign. This visual sign indicates entrance into a potential hazard zone. Thus, you must proceed with caution. Most noteworthy, this carries great importance with regard to how you bring up sensitive topics.
When writing a speech or presentation, people tend to put a great deal of time into the introduction. It’s the key moment that sets the tone for the entire talk.
However, too often we put the least amount of thought into how to start a conversation when we enter into a conflict. As a result, having an ear for repair attempts is significant because:
- it reduces emotional tension
- the right words spoken in the right way lower the stress level
John summarizes these points:
“If we start with defensiveness, criticism, and blame, we’ll probably end up there. If we start with grace, courage, and honesty, we’ll probably end up there (emphasis John’s).”
4. A yield sign. To yield means to slow down. Furthermore, as you slow down, you recognize and acknowledge what the other person is experiencing. As Pastor Ortberg observes, in a relationship, the person holding the power has the lowest level of need. In other words, an inverse relationship exists between love and power.
John concludes: “Stop. Ask. Proceed with caution. Yield. When you ignore the signs, wrecks happen.”
Finally, Pastor Ortberg asks, do you assess others with a flaw audit or a gratitude audit? Only gratitude repairs, rather than ruptures, intimacy. God’s moved toward us from the very beginning. Which way will we move?
Today’s question: What Scriptures help you refrain from ‘dis-appointing’ God? Please share.
Tomorrow’s blog: “A little space . . . to bear the beams of love”