“Heartfelt honesty comes to God on its knees. Hostile honesty comes to God pointing a finger.”- Ann Swindell
As Ann Swindell concludes Chapter 5 of Still Waiting, she inserts on caveat about honesty with God. As a result, it’s important to distinguish between heartfelt honesty and hostile honesty. We must come to God on our knees rather than pointing a finger. For if offense pushes us over the brink, Ann asserts, we’ll walk away from God. And we judge God, choosing to go on without Him.
Thus, although Ann found no answer for the whys of trich in her heart and head, she encountered God’s mercy. God pulled Ann back from the “crag of offense” to His truth and kindness. God gifted her, although she couldn’t perceive it for what it was at the time.
Furthermore, no magic formula took the author from the brink of offense to renewed tenderness with Jesus. Ann simply spent daily time with Him, reading the Bible and praying. Most noteworthy, as Ann kept spending time with Christ, she found it impossible to harden her heart against Him. Hence, Ann observes:
“I came to know his life and love not solely as words on a page but as hope spoken directly to my heart. And I found, maybe fully for the first time, that all I really had was Jesus, and to walk away from him in offense would be more devastating that continuing to deal with trich. If I couldn’t have healing, I knew I could still have Christ. He would be enough for me.”
In conclusion, Ms. Swindell explains the benefits of obedience. For example, obedience:
- enables you to keep putting one foot of faith in front of the other, even when you feel no affection for God
- consists of doing what you know to be true, even when you’re devoid of emotion
- means saying yes to Christ, even if you don’t understand what He is – or isn’t – doing
- trusts God through action and confession, even when your heart feels dead
Today’s question: Do you express heartfelt honesty or hostile honesty toward God? Please share.
Tomorrow’s blog: Letting shame live as a parasite
