“The trauma of having your trust broken by people you thought would never betray you is life altering. But it doesn’t have to be life ruining.”- Lysa TerKeurst
Lysa TerKeurst titles her latest book I Want to Trust You, but I Don’t: Moving Forward When You’re Skeptical of Others, Afraid of What God Will Allow, and Doubtful of Your Own Discernment. In her Introduction (“Fear Has the Louder Voice Right Now”), Lysa expresses her desire that her closest relationships come with the assurance of safety, honesty, and stability. But, she underscores, we don’t always get what we want. Rather, we get what we get.
Yet, when the pendulum swings between being less trusting and skepticism in regard to just about everyone, our thoughts turn into an off-kilter belief system. As a result, we filter everyone through our hurt. And, in the process, we turn into someone we’ve never been before.
However, Lysa notes, sometimes our sense of mistrust is spot-on. Hence, that helps us know what needs addressing. At other times, though, we project things onto others that simply aren’t there. Such mental gymnastics exhaust us. Also, they make us hold back the very best of who we are — lest we get hurt.
Certainly, life requires us to be trusting. A wise nurse once told Lysa that trust is the oxygen of all human relationships. All relationships where we desire a safe and lasting deep connection. Consequently, a relationship without trust is:
- a relationship without vulnerability and depth.
- void of the kind of love we were meant to give and receive.
- one with very little vibrancy and eventually no life at all.
In conclusion, Lysa observes, the shock of broken trust makes life painfully slow and uncomfortably fast at the same time. The disbelief in your current reality slows life down. Yet, the normal pace of life feels too fast for a brain unable to process what’s going on.
Today’s question: What Bible verses help you see broken trust as life altering rather than life ruining? Please share.
Tomorrow’s blog: “Trust issues – not a label”