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    Dave Henning

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      The miracle of forgiveness

      By Dave Henning / July 2, 2012

      Dr. David Stoops (Forgiving the Unforgivable) offers some final thoughts on the process of forgiveness.  Forgiveness usually is not a smooth process from start to finish.  Sometimes God steps into the process in unimaginable ways.  At other times it seems more like we’re poking along on our own. Dr. Stoops then expands on those times […]

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        A false sense of control

        By Dave Henning / June 30, 2012

        Near the end of Forgiving the Unforgivable, Dr. Stoops contrasts the true power of forgiveness with the false sense of control we feel when we withhold forgiveness.  His comment is reminiscent of T. D. Jakes’ assertion that holding onto anger is not a replacement for losing something we love. Dr. Stoops states: “We often believe […]

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          The price of forgiveness

          By Dave Henning / June 30, 2012

          Especially when contemplating a major purchase, we will leave no stone unturned to find the best deal possible.  But when it comes to the high cost of unforgiveness to our faith walk with God, we often seem unable or unwilling to find a more “cost-effective” solution. Hannah More, an English religious writer and philanthropist who […]

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            The Forgiveness Tree

            By Dave Henning / June 28, 2012

            When I was in grade school. my parents planted a tree on our front lawn, between the sidewalk and the curb.  One summer day my mom and I came home to find the tree’s trunk nearly severed.  I immediately suspected three tough brothers who lived down the block, previously described in my Short Meditation “Turning […]

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              Forgiveness- process or decision?

              By Dave Henning / June 27, 2012

              According to Dr. David Stoops (Forgiving the Unforgivable), when we are dealing with an offense that is seemingly unforgivable, the answer is that forgiveness is both a process and a decision.  Forgiveness is like grieving.  It’s a process that takes an indeterminate amount of time, perhaps several years when dealing with an offense that feels […]

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                Healthy anger

                By Dave Henning / June 26, 2012

                Earlier in Forgiving the Unforgivable, Dr. David Stoops stated that anger is a necessary part of the forgiveness process.  But not all types of anger are created equal.  Is there a type of anger that is productive? Dr. Stoops describes healthy anger this way: “Healthy anger involves a concern with justice, with protecting you and […]

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                  Forgive and remember- Part 3

                  By Dave Henning / June 25, 2012

                  Virgil Elizondo is a Mexican-American Roman Catholic priest who teachers at the University of Notre Dame in South Bend, IN.  In Forgiving the Unforgivable, Dr. David Stoops relates an experience Father Elizondo had while visiting a monument in Paris, France.  The monument was dedicated to the memory of deported French people who had died in […]

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                    Forgiveness and/or reconciliation

                    By Dave Henning / June 24, 2012

                    In Chapter 3 of Forgiving the Unforgivable, Dr. David Stoops says that when he speaks on forgiveness he’s reminded of the main thing that keeps people in a bind over forgiveness- the belief that forgivenss and reconciliation are synonymous.  He elaborates on the distinction between them: “It is important that we see forgiveness and reconciliation […]

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                      “I don’t like your God”

                      By Dave Henning / June 23, 2012

                      Dr. David Stoops (Forgiving the Unforgivable) tells the story of a young man he was counseling who had been deeply hurt by his pastor and was unwilling to forgive the pastor unless that pastor repented.  Dr. Stoops responded that he didn’t like the young man’s God.  What Dr. Stoops meant was that the young man’s […]

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                        Forgive and remember- Part 2

                        By Dave Henning / June 22, 2012

                        Another common misperception implicit in the phrase “forgive and forget” is the notion that if we forgive we are in effect saying that the offense against us is of no consequence.  Quite the contrary.  Forgiveness is never a magic wand that turns something evil into something good. Dr. David Stoops (Forgiving the Unforgivable) comments on […]

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                          Forgive and remember

                          By Dave Henning / June 20, 2012

                          ‘Forgive and forget’- that phrase most likely has been part of our vocabulary since childhood, when our parents imprinted that instruction in our minds as the proper response to our conflict with another child.  Actually, notes Dr. David Stoops (Forgiving the Unforgivable), that adage has been around approximately 700 years, since the 14th century.  Jeremiah […]

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                            Forgiveness and anger- like oil and water?

                            By Dave Henning / June 19, 2012

                            When going through the process of forgiveness, do the feelings of anger that inevitably interject themselves compromise or jeopardize (guess what show I was watching when I wrote this) the whole process? Dr. David Stoop (Forgiving the Unforgivable) asserts that not only is it alright to get angry, anger is a necessary part of the […]

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