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Dave Henning


Grief kept knocking – let it in

By Dave Henning / May 9, 2023

“Grief kept knocking.  And when I finally let it in everything got a little clearer and I finally knew what I had to do.  I had to put the unrealistic picture of this person and this relationship into the flame of grief.  And plan a funeral.”- Lysa TerKeurst In Chapter 12 (“A Million Little Funerals”), […]


Breaking point – wait or establish

By Dave Henning / May 8, 2023

“There’s a big difference between waiting for a breaking point and establishing a breaking point. . . .  Establishing a breaking point can sometimes be a boundary that helps a relationship stay healthy.  It clears up the nebulous questions around what is and is not permitted between you and the other person.  That clarity will […]


A primary sign of toxicity

By Dave Henning / May 7, 2023

“[Jesus] spoke the truth and respected people’s choices. . . .  controlling others is a primary sign of toxicity, not a method for ministry.  Jesus never cheapened the beauty of what he was saying by appearing desperate.  In fact, he pretty much took the opposite approach: this is what’s true; take it or leave it.  […]


Memories – greatest treasures, sorrows

By Dave Henning / May 6, 2023

“We’ve survived what we’ve feared.  But can we survive the remembering?  Memories are both our greatest treasures and our greatest sorrows. . . . Most of the time, when a goodbye has been spoken, memories become an impossible tangle of both grief and greatness, sorrow and celebration.”- Lysa TerKeurst In Chapter 10 (“Can a Goodbye […]


Please God or please people

By Dave Henning / May 5, 2023

“The raw truth is we will always desperately want from other people what we fear we will never get from God. . . .  Trying to please people won’t ultimately satisfy us or the other person, and it certainly doesn’t please God. . . .  If I have a need and I demand it from […]


People pleasing = inverted security

By Dave Henning / May 4, 2023

“People pleasing isn’t just about keeping others happy.  It’s about getting from them what we think we must have in order to feel okay in the world. . . .  It’s an inverted security that only makes us more and more insecure with every realization that people aren’t designed for or capable of filling in […]


Alignment with God’s truth

By Dave Henning / May 3, 2023

“Because I want to be whole, I must keep other people’s comments about me separate from what I believe about myself.  Therefore, I must stay whole by keeping what I know, what I feel, and what I believe in alignment with God’s truth about who I am.”- Lysa TerKeurst “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy […]


Bring relief to the grief

By Dave Henning / May 2, 2023

“Good boundaries bring relief to the grief of letting other people’s opinions, issues, desires, and agendas run our life.  But if we see boundaries as a one-way ticket to acting unkind, unchristian, or uncaring, there will be no relief.”- Lysa TerKeurst In Chapter 8 (“Trying to Make Someone Else Happy Shouldn’t Be Your Definition of […]


Checking ourselves = healthy

By Dave Henning / May 1, 2023

“While checking ourselves is healthy, questioning our identity is not.  Checking ourselves means looking at a current attitude or behavior to see if it is in line with God’s instructions and wisdom.  Questioning our identity is doubting who we are because we have given too much power to other people by letting their opinions define […]


Knowledge and discernment – love

By Dave Henning / April 30, 2023

“What I like about Philippians 1:9-10 is that the love here is associated with knowledge and discernment.  So the inverse is also true.  A lack of wisdom and discernment is actually unloving. . . .  when setting boundaries our heart posture should be one of wisdom and discernment for the sake of true and healthy […]


Healthy equilibrium – possible

By Dave Henning / April 29, 2023

“Healthy equilibrium in a relationship is possible only when both people are equally committed to these things: healthy habits, self-awareness, and empathy for the feelings of the other person.”- Lysa TerKeurst “Be alert and of sober mind.  Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion for someone to devour.”- 1 Peter 5:8 (NIV) […]


Glimpses of kindness, potential

By Dave Henning / April 28, 2023

“What you see in glimpses should be what you see the majority of the time.  If the glimpses of kindness and potential are what’s keeping you going, then eventually you’ll start accepting even harsh things as good.  If you find yourself so grateful for the smallest common courtesy, you’re hanging your hope on nothing but […]

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