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    Unpacking anxiety

    By Dave Henning / July 14, 2012

    When moving into a new home, the major task ahead is unpacking all the boxes and settling in.  Similarly, when the gorilla (unforgiveness) moves into our hearts, Brian Jones (Getting Rid of the Gorilla) tells us the first thing the gorilla unpacks is anxiety. Pastor Jones goes on to explain: “Anxiety masks the real issues […]

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      The battle belongs to the Lord

      By Dave Henning / July 13, 2012

      The process of forgiveness is not done in isolation.  Not only do we need the support of good Christian friends, most importantly we need our Lord’s aid, counsel and direction.  H. Norman Wright (cited by Brian Jones in Getting Rid of the Gorilla) likens this concept to a favorite childhood game: “Forgiveness involves letting go.  […]

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        Our shared humanity

        By Dave Henning / July 11, 2012

        Brian Jones adds that an additional effect of showing kindness is that it softens our hearts and remind us of the true condition of our souls.  However, this is not characteristic of our initial reaction to being hurt.  It’s really quite understandable that our first focus is on the offender’s faults. Pastor Jones explains: “It’s […]

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          Our ticket out (of unforgiveness)

          By Dave Henning / July 10, 2012

          In Chapter 7 of Getting Rid of the Gorilla, Brian Jones states: “Hatred is what has imprisoned us.  Kindness is our ticket out.  We’ve got to do what disciples do.  Disciples love their enemies, personal enemies with names and faces . . .” Pastor Jones goes on to discuss 3 reasons why kindness, which he […]

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            Better description- Christian or disciple?

            By Dave Henning / July 10, 2012

            In Chapter 7 (“Call”) of Getting Rid of the Gorilla, Brian Jones states that he prefers the word disciple to the word Christian because the word disciple tells what a follower of Christ does, while the word Christian designates to whom we belong. Furthermore, Pastor Jones believes that discipleship is the key to getting rid […]

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              The path of least resistance?

              By Dave Henning / July 8, 2012

              Brian Jones (Getting Rid of the Gorilla) says that a major reason forgiveness is so difficult for us is that we believe the process will take too long and we are unwilling or unable to invest in the process.  We’d rather live with the gorilla (a heart of unforgiveness) than take on the more difficult tasks of […]

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                Short-circuiting forgiveness

                By Dave Henning / July 8, 2012

                You may recall that in Forgiving the Unforgivable, Dr. David Stoops stated that when we forgive too quickly we merely are excusing the behavior.  In other words, our forgiveness is incomplete. Brian Jones begins Chapter 5 (“Myths”) of Getting Rid of the Gorilla with a quote by Dr. Stoops from his book, coauthored by Dr. […]

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                  Creating distance: a two-edged sword

                  By Dave Henning / July 7, 2012

                  Brian Jones begins Chapter 3 of Getting Rid of the Gorilla with this insightful quote from noted author James Baldwin (Notes of a Native Son): “I imagine that one of the reasons people cling to their hates so stubbornly is because they sense, once hate is gone, that they will be forced to deal with […]

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                    Anger vs. rage- Part 2

                    By Dave Henning / July 6, 2012

                    Brian Jones makes one final distinction between anger and rage in Chapter 2 of Getting Rid of the Gorilla.  He adds that while it’s natural to get angry when we’ve been hurt, we make the decision whether or not to turn that anger into rage.  So why might that option be so tempting? According to […]

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                      Anger vs. rage

                      By Dave Henning / July 4, 2012

                      In Chapter 2 of Getting Rid of the Gorilla, Pastor Brian Jones provides a stark contrast between anger and rage. Anger is: 1.  Normal 2.  Proportionate to the degree of the offense 3.  A God-given emotion 4.  Directed at a specific individual or group 5.  The Greek word for anger in the Bible (orge) means “to be […]

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                        Is there a gorilla in the house?

                        By Dave Henning / July 4, 2012

                        Brian Jones opens Getting Rid of the Gorilla: Confessions on the Struggle to Forgive with this quote on forgiveness by C. S. Lewis (Mere Christianity): “Everyone says forgiveness is a lovely idea, until they have something to forgive.”  In other words, while we all know what Jesus said about forgiveness, it is quite another matter […]

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                          The miracle of forgiveness

                          By Dave Henning / July 2, 2012

                          Dr. David Stoops (Forgiving the Unforgivable) offers some final thoughts on the process of forgiveness.  Forgiveness usually is not a smooth process from start to finish.  Sometimes God steps into the process in unimaginable ways.  At other times it seems more like we’re poking along on our own. Dr. Stoops then expands on those times […]

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