All posts in " shame "

The partners of destruction

By Dave Henning / January 26, 2024

“Shame and guilt go hand in hand, one feeding the other.  They are partners of destruction, eroding our lives. . . .  Few emotions can distort our mirror and make us feel as dirty, ugly, unworthy, and unlovable as guilt does.  And we all struggle with it — no exceptions.”- Chip Ingram “And you were […]


A horrible motivator – shame

By Dave Henning / January 24, 2024

“Religion, regardless of the form it takes, often tries to control people through shame as a means of getting them to behave better.  But shame is a horrible motivator and usually has the opposite effect.  Shaming someone into doing the right thing rarely works for long.”- Chip Ingram “Yet to all who did receive him, […]


Biblical hope – certain

By Dave Henning / January 21, 2024

“When the Bible talks about hope, it’s not just wishful thinking.  Biblical hope is certain.  It’s looking forward to what’s absolutely going to happen.  The object of our hope is still in our future, but it’s already a fact.”- Chip Ingram “I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened, in order […]


Only redeeming aspect of shame

By Dave Henning / January 20, 2024

“Perhaps the only redeeming aspect of shame is that even though it (shame) usually results in guilt and self-deprecation, shame can also lead us to God and His answers.  It sends us in search of a Savior. . . .  We instinctively know we need someone to rescue us from this debilitating force.  And in […]


Gathering our loneliness and shame

By Dave Henning / November 23, 2021

“Let’s begin by gathering our loneliness and shame and taking them home to our Father, who will overwhelm our shame with His perfect love and satisfy our deepest longings for belonging.”- Ruth Graham “Even in laughter the heart may ache, and the end of joy may be grief.”- Proverbs 14:13 (ESV) “God makes a home […]


Healthy conviction from a faith perspective

By Dave Henning / December 9, 2020

“From a faith perspective, we can think of healthy conviction as a motivating factor that leads us to repent of, or change, our actions.  This is a beautiful, necessary part of growth and learning to try softer. . . .  We all need a healthy sense of personal responsibility to help us love others well.”- […]


A compass on our God-journey

By Dave Henning / October 28, 2020

“One of the most important truths that serves as a compass for us on our God-journey, ensuring we always head in the right direction, is refusing to keep secrets with the devil.  This means we have to be transparent with God.”- Heath Adamson Heath Adamson concludes Chapter 6 of The Sacred Chase as he talks […]


Relevance as an excuse to compromise?

By Dave Henning / October 18, 2020

” . . . we must never use relevance as an excuse to compromise. . . .  adjusting your lifestyle is not equal to walking humbly and purely before God.  There is a realm of intimacy with God based solely on the access to your heart you provide to God.  Self-awareness can be difficult.  We […]


Toxic clouds of shame – clear them

By Dave Henning / July 16, 2020

“Clear any toxic clouds of shame that have been clinging to you.  And in their absence, it becomes a lot easier to discover your blue flame, as well as the truest version of yourself.”- Jennifer Fulwiler In Chapter 8 (“You Can Finally Accept Yourself”) of Your Blue Flame, Jennifer Fulwiler states we often extinguish our […]


Conscious choices to get your life back

By Dave Henning / June 21, 2020

“You’re going to have to make some conscious choices to get your life back.  The first has to be to confront your pain for what it is and determine to process it rather than obsess over it.  The second is to not let it steal the rest of your loved ones from you.”- Phil Waldrep […]


Emotionally hurt – counterproductive protection

By Dave Henning / June 20, 2020

“When we are emotionally hurt or have experienced trauma, our subconscious minds often work to protect us in ways that are counterproductive.  Shame and vulnerability are so toxic to our identities that our subconscious mind does everything it can to avoid them.”- Phil Waldrep Phil Waldrep continues Chapter 5 of Beyond Betrayal as he observes […]


Eliminate shame from our relational diet?

By Dave Henning / May 30, 2020

“Although it is tempting to hope that we can eliminate shame from our relational diet, it is futile to wish for this.  Our hope is, rather, changing our response to it as we journey together toward God’s kingdom. . . .  As such  . . . we starve [shame] over time, not by avoiding it […]

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